Self-help books say to ask for what you want instead of holding it inside, so today, I told someone I wanted them to kiss my ass.

This creamy body wash is completely handmade and smells like a carnival. Well, maybe that’s not technically true. No body stench from people who don’t know what deodorant is but choose to stand in your personal space and no sweet, perfect, heavenly smell of funnel cake. So, okay, scratch the carnival scent. It smells like cotton candy. Good news is, it won’t rot your teeth or make your thighs bigger.

Directions: Squeeze out desired amount, rub onto skin to work up a lather, then rinse well.

Ingredients: Water, Cocamidopropyl Betaine, Sodium Cocoyl Isethionate(SCI), Glycerin, Emulsifying Wax, Shea Butter, Fragrance, Propylene Glycol, Diazolidinyl Urea, Iodopropynyl Butylcarbamate, Micas. Made with love and sass.

Approx. 8oz